Healing, boundaries and choosing myself.

 Healing Doesn't Mean Hardening Your Heart                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          For a long time, I thought healing meant becoming less sensitive, less emotional, less affected by the things and people that hurt me. I believed that if I could toughen up, I'd finally be safe.                                                                                                                                                                                                            But healing didn't look like that at all.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          Healing looked like learning my limits like understanding that boundaries are not walls they are doors I get to open and close with intension, they are not punishments for others; they are acts of care for myself.                                                                                                                                                                              There was a time when I gave too much of myself in the name of love I mistook over giving for loyalty and silence for strength. I ignored my discomfort because I didn't want to seem difficult, dramatic or ''too much'' and in doing so, I slowly abandoned myself.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    What healing has taught me is this: loving deeply does not require self-neglect.                                                                                                                                                                                                                        Boundaries don't make you cold, they make you honest, they allow you to love without losing yourself in the process, they help you stay soft while still being safe.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            Choosing yourself can feel uncomfortable at first, especially if you're used to being the one who understands, forgives and adjusts. But self-development sometimes asks us to disappoint others so we can finally show up for ourselves.                                                                                                                                                                                                                If you are in a season of healing, know that you don't have to shrink your heart to protect it, you don't have to stop loving. you just have to start loving yourself with the same care you give to others.                                                                                                                                                                                      And that, too, is growth.